What next??

So I did it! I took the test with out having sweaty palms, a horrible feeling in my stomach, and with complete concentration on my task. I bombed the reading comp. but did well on the other sections so I'm hoping it will kind of even itself out. Now though comes the waiting. I hate waiting. As I've said time and time again, God forgot to give me patience. I think I have enough to distract me in the coming weeks but there will always be a little nagging feeling until I get the results back.

On the other hand I've learned a lot of valuable things. I don't know why I'm continually surprised by it but I do actually have an amazing support system in my life. I've had a lot of love and a lot of showing of support over the last few month by friends, family, and co-workers. I hope one day I can repay them all for everything they've done for me. I'm truly blessed that there are genuinely good people around me.

I knew I always missed college but I didn't realize how much I missed the learning part of it. I like obtaining knowledge and learning about the world. I'm amazed by how much I don't know and how much I want to know it. I'm excited to start school again and excited to be pursuing my dreams, finally!

Calming down and living life is so much more important than sweating the small details. I need to continue to teach myself that it's ok that I can't control every situation. I need to relax, step back and sometimes just let life run it's course. I'm so busy all the time trying to build dams that I forget to see the beauty in the unknown and extraordinary things that have come into my life. I never realized how many time a day I think in a negative way until I realized how hard it was for me to come up with positive thoughts.

I can't be anyone other than me, and I can't change the people around me, so instead I'm going to try harder to learn, I'm going to try harder to love, and I'm going to try harder to find the positive.