The Gambler

"You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em. Know when to walk away, and know when to run. You never count your money, when you're sittin' at the table. There'll be time enough for countin', when the dealings done."

Now, I've never been much for country but this seems to be a song that's followed me all through out life. It's a great metaphor for life and all the trials and tribulations it brings you but the song always seems to come up when I'm dealing with love. 

Like I said below (in another post) I was never blessed to know what a good relationship looks like. I know how to love, what love feels like, but when it comes to parlaying that into a good relationship, it always falls short. 

I'm in limbo right now. I'm stuck somewhere in between friendship and relationship and I can't seem to make the leap into one or the other. I know where I'm at and I know where he's at and I don't know how to get this level. Friends have voiced their concerns, parents and siblings have dispensed their advice and their fears, and still my mind races like a raving mad lunatic. 

I don't hold the right cards. The cards I have are playable but, it will take a lot of skill and a lot of luck to win. I kind of know what my adversary may hold but I'm not quite sure. I know his motives and some of his tells but a surprise is always a possibility. 

I need to talk to him but, his coy ploys at unavailability are what is keeping me in limbo. 

Up and down goes the yo-yo, I've been here before, I just don't know if I can get out again.